Who the F**K is Ruth Carter?
Most people by now have received a facebook friend request from someone they have never met.
Posted in Columbia University, Comedy 2 Comments
Why HSBC Sucks
HSBC: bureaucratic hurdles for shits and giggles.
Posted in Comedy, Travel Leave a comment
Why I Go with My Mother to Work on Vacation
I've gone with my mother to her job these past days of winter break. If I didn't, I'd sleep till 10AM and watch TV and not exercise. Instead, my mom wakes me up at 7AM, I go to the local gym, and get a lot of work done without the distraction of the Internet. I feel very accomplished by 5PM.
My mother is a molecular biology researcher at a global pharmaceuticals company. While she works at the lab bench with other oncologists on cancer drugs, I read books, blog, and sample every flavor of prepackaged espresso and tea in the lounge.
On my third consecutive day at the office (more accurately described as a huge research and development complex with unique Swedish architecture), an employee finally asked me about what the hell I was doing there. Human resources employee Andrew approached me as I reached for the "Sumatran blend" flavor.
Posted in Columbia University, Comedy, holidays Leave a comment
How to Get Some Lean, Blue Ass
Jake Sully got away with infiltrating an alien clan, ruining a sacred arranged marriage, and betraying an entire planet's trust. Did I mention that he also got a piece of lean, blue ass?
Posted in TV & movies 6 Comments
Why I Am Freezing to Death
I may soon have to heat water on the stove for a hot shower. Over the weekend, my father lowered the temperature of all the house's thermostats . He was afraid the heating oil tank in our basement did not contain enough oil to adequately heat our house through the new year's first weekend.
Posted in Comedy, Wellesley, holidays 4 Comments
4 Bleak New Year’s Predictions
It's a new year, and already the world's off to a rough start. Last night I found myself telling a friend about my predictions for 2010. They're bleak. Maybe I have a fascination with the macabre and apocalyptic. But remember, if any of them turn out to be true, you saw it here first.
Posted in Current Events 1 Comment
I Saw Mommy Dancing in a Thong With Santa Claus
My friend told me he was recently involved in an "epic incident." Since we go to different colleges, I asked him what happened. He sent me the following excerpt from his resident advisor's logbook. I assume he received it in the mail with the rest of the notice that said his school was suspending him for a semester.
Posted in Comedy, holidays 4 Comments
Is CNN Always Like This?
You know it's Christmas when the anchor dances in her seat to Christmas jingles, the weatherman shares his personal travel plans, and the correspondents call each other by the wrong names.
Posted in Comedy, holidays, journalism 1 Comment
Chinatown Bus, Worth the Risk?
If you ever step onto a Fung Wah bus and notice dozens of them hanging inside, DO NOT GET ON. Here's why...
Columbia Students Forget Their Sanity
Do Columbia students need to be sane human beings? What does it mean if we do?
Posted in Columbia University, Comedy 3 Comments
Thanksgiving and a Blast From the Past
Hopefully everyone is having a fun Thanksgiving. If you are not, sexy pilgrims singing R&B will cheer you up.
Posted in Columbia University, Comedy Leave a comment
Evil Testing Serpent
"There should be some serious investigations into the nature of your shit."
Posted in Columbia University Leave a comment
Fort Hood Shooter Tied to Radical Cleric
The front page of the Times broke the story of how Major Hasan, the army officer who killed 13 people at Fort Hood last week, was communicating with a radical Yemini cleric since last year. Not only that, but US intelligence agencies knew about it long ago.
Posted in Current Events, Intelligence Community Leave a comment
Three Macs and a Toaster