Monthly Archives: January 2010

Three Macs and a Toaster

By David Xia | Published: January 26, 2010

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Posted in Comedy | 2 Comments

Who the F**K is Ruth Carter?

By David Xia | Published: January 25, 2010
Most people by now have received a facebook friend request from someone they have never met.

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Posted in Columbia University, Comedy | 2 Comments

Why HSBC Sucks

By David Xia | Published: January 18, 2010

HSBC is not "the world's local bank" as their motto states. You'll find branches in 86 countries on every single continent, but each region's HSBC is an entirely separate bank.

I opened an account in Hong Kong's HSBC  last summer. When I left the country, I left behind a sizeable chunk of change in the HK HSBC account. Now I want it back so I can close the HK HSBC


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Posted in Comedy, Travel | 2 Comments

Most Horrendous Gaffe Ever?

By David Xia | Published: January 11, 2010
The president of a certain female liberal arts college once compared herself to the pope and the act of endorsing a political candidate to Jews devouring Christian babies.

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Posted in Columbia University, Comedy, journalism | 1 Comment

Why I Go with My Mother to Work on Vacation

By David Xia | Published: January 11, 2010
I've gone with my mother to her job these past days of winter break. If I didn't, I'd sleep till 10AM and watch TV and not exercise. Instead, my mom wakes me up at 7AM, I go to the local gym, and get a lot of work done without the distraction of the Internet. I feel very accomplished by 5PM. My mother is a molecular biology researcher at a global pharmaceuticals company. While she works at the lab bench with other oncologists on cancer drugs, I read books, blog, and sample every flavor of prepackaged espresso and tea in the lounge. On my third consecutive day at the office (more accurately described as a huge research and development complex with unique Swedish architecture), an employee finally asked me about what the hell I was doing there. Human resources employee Andrew approached me as I reached for the "Sumatran blend" flavor.

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Posted in Columbia University, Comedy, holidays | Leave a comment

How to Get Some Lean, Blue Ass

By David Xia | Published: January 6, 2010
Jake Sully got away with infiltrating an alien clan, ruining a sacred arranged marriage, and betraying an entire planet's trust. Did I mention that he also got a piece of lean, blue ass?

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Posted in TV & movies | 6 Comments

Why I Am Freezing to Death

By David Xia | Published: January 4, 2010
I may soon have to heat water on the stove for a hot shower. Over the weekend, my father lowered the temperature of all the house's thermostats . He was afraid the heating oil tank in our basement did not contain enough oil to adequately heat our house through the new year's first weekend.

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Posted in Comedy, Wellesley, holidays | 4 Comments

4 Bleak New Year’s Predictions

By David Xia | Published: January 3, 2010
It's a new year, and already the world's off to a rough start. Last night I found myself telling a friend about my predictions for 2010. They're bleak. Maybe I have a fascination with the macabre and apocalyptic. But remember, if any of them turn out to be true, you saw it here first.

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Posted in Current Events | 1 Comment