Hours of Clueless Toil by Me

By David Xia | Published: June 28, 2010
I spent the entire day today tweaking the look and layout of this blog. After days of learning javascript, PHP, and mySQL, I decided I would rather swallow molten solder. I put down the books and hoped I was literate enough to dig deep into the bowels of Wordpress code. I was wrong.

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Posted in Technology | Leave a comment

Have Grad Students Made a Terrible Life Choice?

By David Xia | Published: June 25, 2010
The article compares the academic system to a giant Ponzi scheme approaching assured self-destruction if it stays the course. A system that recklessly burns through the nation's intellectual capital by taking in suckers of doe-eyed graduate students, chews them up, and spits them out.

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Posted in Career, journalism | 2 Comments

Gravity Doesn’t Exist On Planet Academia

By David Xia | Published: June 24, 2010
Yesterday I read a Times article about law schools artificially boosting students' grades to help them find employment in this tough economy. I knew grade inflation was bad, but I didn't know it was that bad. The article also links to a website that tracks national trends in grade inflation. Across the board, the average GPA in public and private schools has been creeping up since the 1960s.

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Posted in Columbia University, Current Events | Leave a comment

Job-Seeking Advice I

By David Xia | Published: June 21, 2010
Attention college juniors! Right now you're enjoying summer weather, settling into your subleased apartment, and getting ready to make some dough from that sinecure of a resume-padding internship. But the summer ends and it's senior year sooner than you think. With senior year and the approach of graduation also comes the specter of "What the f**k am I going to do with my life now?"

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Posted in Career, Columbia University | 1 Comment

Imagine Thousands of Rats Killing You

By David Xia | Published: June 20, 2010
A couple of nights ago I saw a NOVA show about rats. It was terrifying. Here's why:

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Posted in Nature/Outdoors, TV & movies | Leave a comment

Business School Library = MBA Meat Market

By David Xia | Published: June 20, 2010
An overheard conversation that confirmed my suspicions that the business school library isn't a place where a lot of people go for serious studying but rather a meat market for MBAs and all other types of roaming academic bipeds.

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Posted in Columbia University, Comedy | Leave a comment

Floor Plans

By David Xia | Published: June 20, 2010
A friend recently wrote to me that he's having a great time trespassing in dangerous buildings undergoing construction. He even e-mailed some photographs of the floor plans he filched. Show-off.

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Posted in Uncategorized | Leave a comment

CDC Updated Growth Charts

By David Xia | Published: June 19, 2010
In my previous post, I talked about how I compared my childhood growth to the Center for Disease Control's 2000 growth charts. Some questions I had while doing this:

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Posted in Uncategorized | Leave a comment

My Mother’s Growth Records

By David Xia | Published: June 19, 2010
If she wasn't my parent I would've filed a restraining order. It was freaky yet touching.

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Posted in Uncategorized | Leave a comment

Dear Perverted Reader…

By David Xia | Published: June 14, 2010
To put it frankly: some of this shit is seriously fucked up. I'd never want to meet some of the people who are reading my posts. Why? Because these some of them searched: "biggest dildo death", "i saw mommy naked," etc.

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Posted in Comedy, Technology | 2 Comments

How I Almost Burned Down My Dorm

By David Xia | Published: June 14, 2010
The whole thing lit up faster than a Woodstock audience on 4/20.

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Posted in Columbia University, Comedy | 1 Comment

Sane Person’s Sleep Schedule vs Insane Person’s

By David Xia | Published: June 12, 2010
For his semester-end statistics project, my suitemate presented the data he collected on his sleeping schedule. His sleep schedule, among his friends, is cause for either concern about his psychological well-being or reason to suspect he puts on a cape and mask and does crazy shit during ungodly hours.

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Posted in Columbia University, Comedy | 4 Comments

Climaxed Her?

By David Xia | Published: June 12, 2010

Captcha tells me to verify I'm a human by typing "climaxed her." What are the chances of that?


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Posted in Comedy, Technology | Leave a comment

Scariest Photo You’ll Ever See

By David Xia | Published: June 12, 2010
This is a picture of a friend’s stomach taken sideways while he’s sitting down. I know what you’re thinking, "My crotch called. It wants its pubes back."

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Posted in Columbia University, Comedy | 1 Comment

Don’t Use Google Voice To Plan Conspiracy

By David Xia | Published: June 11, 2010
Another creepy thing is the fact that even though I supposedly "deleted forever" this voicemail from my Google Voice account, I can still retrieve the original audio via the link above. I don't even need to be logged into my account (which is how you can access it). Oh, the implications! I'll keep that in mind next time I have an affair, plan a price fixing conspiracy, or flood the streets of Baltimore with heroine. Yup. Definitely won't use Google Voice.

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Posted in Comedy | 2 Comments